Life is the art of drawing without an eraser ~ John W. Gardner

Farewell Grandma

2 years… I have said farewell to 2 of my loved ones.

Grandma passed away 2 weeks ago… I have never felt this heartbroken before. The heartache was unbearable… How my heart beat and felt when I was in the hospital knowing that grandma was gone. There is absolutely nothing that could describe that feeling. To see father broke down in tears, that was even more painful……

It had been a week she was unconscious. She was so thin, I could not even see her on the bed from far. Eventhough she was thin, her hands and fingers were still silky smooth. I am lucky to be with her for the last 3 days… held her hands, talked to her…… She had beautiful long and tender fingers, her nails were pinkish, and so was her face.

I was sitting beside her that afternoon, she looked fine, even without the oxygen mask. She didn’t cough anymore, she was sleeping so peacefully. For that moment, I strongly believed that she was going to be fine, she would wake up eventually. I even planned to go back to work 2 days later. I left her in the evening, for dinner and all that……… Who would know that that was my last moment with her. If I knew, I wouldn’t have left……

My beloved beautiful grandma had left… I have always wanted her to see me get married……. It would never come true now, I have let her waited too long, and she couldn’t wait any longer.

And now, I have to use past tense to describe her…… How sad……

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