I Couldn’t Help
Today, I would be exactly 3 months pregnant if I did not miscarry……
I couldn’t help it. It would just come to my mind every now and then.
I am not trying very hard to get pregnant again, I do not want to put pressure on myself. I still enjoy my life with Andrew and we enjoy each other’s companion just like we did. Nothing much has changed.
It is just, that little sadness would often creep back in my heart.
And the memory of “I used to be briefly pregnant” can sometimes be overwhelming.
My friend, told me it is alright to feel what I feel now. It took another woman who has miscarried to understand how it feels. She too would think, “my son/daughter would be 2 years old”……
All it’s left, is memory…… And it will be with me, for ever.
Dated 22th September 2012